ANDREW PAULSON
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forgiveness

1/15/2015

2 Comments

 
Hey bloggers! Today I'd like to talk about a very universal topic, forgiveness. We all struggle with this concept of forgiveness, from the trivial fights to the century-long grudges, and although we've been on both sides, we seem to forget our own flaws when we're in the position to forgive. I, like you, am not immune to this perpetual disease and as I look back on my life I realize that there were several instances when I simply chose not to forgive. Yet if we all know that we have a difficulty forgiving, why don't we change our ways? If we can acknowledge that there is in fact a problem, we're half-way to finding an answer.

A few weeks ago, I subtweeted about an old friend from high school, whom I've grown apart from in the last six months or so. I knew it was wrong, but perhaps it was the physical distance between us or the safety of my screen name, but I felt untouchable, and I was taking no prisoners with my abusive tweet. At the time, I thought it was funny, but upon further review, I realized it was just mean. Oh, and so did she. She quickly favorited my pandoras box, and with that favorite, I knew our friendship, or what we had left of one, was over. Later that night, she sent me a text message confronting me about the situation, to which I did not reply for fear of making the situation worse. Several days later, I still had an unwelcome and unweary feeling in the pit of my stomach that I had done something terrible. I could no longer hide what I was feeling, and my guilt was welling up through every pore in my body. Since that realization, I've been discussing the situation with some of my other friends and trying to determine what my next step is. Do I apologize and own up to my monstrous attack, or do I play it cool, pretending it never happened in the first place? There are advantages and disadvantages of both routes, however I instantly know which road I should take, and that is the road of apology... What can I say? I was a terrible friend, I know! Although I can't take it back, I wish I could, for there is nothing I can do now but own up to my mistake and offer an apology. I needed to fix what I had done and make it right, but would she ever forgive me for what I did? Only time will tell.

After my epiphany, I quickly texted her and owned up to the whole thing, saying what a terrible friend I was and that I felt completely awful for what I said. Although this text could never repair what I had done, it was my only way to attempt to amend our friendship. I made sure to include that although we might not continue to be friends in the future, I didn't want any bad blood between us, but that I knew that might not be possible. After 20 minutes, my worst fear was realized. The four letter word "read" appeared under my message, but no response. One, two, three days later I still had no response, so i decided to try again. After my second and third attempts at mending the situation, nothing changed, and I began to think nothing ever would. I am still waiting for the day we can talk about this and move past it, but for right now I've done all I can do.

In our culture today, subtweeting has become a right of passage so to speak, and cyber bullying is on the rise every day. Is it the anonymity of our screen name that gives us the power to say things we never would face-to-face? Or are we just becoming ruder people? We've all subtweeted, and if you say you haven't, you're lying to yourself and everyone else. We've all had someone subtweet about us, and although it's wrong, it is an unfortunate part of growing up in a technology-based society. Here's where forgiveness comes into play. Simply put, life is too short. We only get a limited number of days on this planet, and why should we waste any of them holding silly grudges? I know... easier said than done. How can we forgive people who have wronged us? What if they did a really terrible thing? These are all great questions that nobody but you can answer, but I try to approach them with the fundamental understanding that everyone makes mistakes. You make mistakes, and so do I, it's a part of being human. A sucky part, but still a part. 

For those bloggers out there who are religious, we are reminded to forgive every time we say the Lord's Prayer. "Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us..." It's right there! Why let this beautifully pure and elegant prayer contain empty words that we recite once a week? Should we not try to actually be like Christ in our everyday lives? We all know the answer to this question, yet once we leave the pews and hymnals behind, we forget everything we just learned. How can we change this? It's simple, FORGIVE! I challenge you to forgive someone for something they have done to you. It doesn't have to be big, but just simply, forgive. Remind yourself that nobody's perfect (except maybe Hannah Montana), and humble yourself that you've also been there. Forgiving just one person can start a chain-reaction, leaving you well on the way to becoming a happier and healthier person.

Well bloggers, thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed my first blog, and please comment, tag, and share with your friends! I'll be posting every so often, so check back if you have some time. Have an amazing day and remember, forgive!

Picture: http://mariashriver.com/wp-content/uploads/drupal/FamilyForgive.jpeg?bd3f04​
 

  
2 Comments
Anne B.
1/14/2015 09:13:40 pm

I love the man you are becoming.

Reply
Melissa
8/17/2015 04:09:01 pm

This.

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